O is for Optimism
A pessimist, they say, sees a glass of water as being half empty; an optimist sees the same glass as half full. But a giving person sees a glass of water and starts looking for someone who might be thirsty. G. Donald Gale Optimism 1. A tendency to expect the best possible outcome or dwell on the most hopeful aspects of a situation: “There is a touch of optimism in every worry about one's own moral cleanliness” (Victoria Ocampo). 2. Philosophy a. The doctrine, asserted by Leibnitz, that this world is the best of all possible worlds. b. The belief that the universe is improving and that good will ultimately triumph over evil. Source:
The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English
Language, Fourth Edition |
I drive people crazy. Yes, it's true - I do. Why? Because I'm always looking for and finding the positive in situations. A friend recently described me as seeing the glass as three-quarters full - that was her way of saying that I'm even more positive and optimistic in my outlook than most people. This is not to say that nothing ever throws me for a loop or sets me back in any way. Read my story "Beating the Hill, Embracing the Wind" for an example (here).
Life is full of challenges. We can't control the challenges. We can't determine what's going to fall on us out of the sky or when someone is going to do something unexpected and painful. What we can control is how we react and how we feel.
Yes, I believe we can control how we feel. I don't mean something like "Oh my goodness! A truck just ran over my foot and I'm going to decide to be happy about that right now!" What I mean is that we can create our own outlook on life, our own context, and by doing so we can determine how we might feel when some negative or challenging experience occurs.
Let's look at this from a couple of perspectives...
Leadership and a Positive Outlook
Repeat to Yourself, "Life Isn't an Emergency"
Richard
Carlson, Ph.D.
Don't
Sweat The Small Stuff.
As individuals, we each look to our leaders to set the standard and the example. Thus, as leaders, we have a tremendous responsibility - what we do, how we speak, the ideas we share all have a significant impact on those around us.
Let's say that I have an idea and take it to my boss and she says "That will never work!" What's the likelihood that I'm going to take another idea to her any time soon? Not high!
If we're discussing the business, and the CEO says "The outlook is bleak" you can bet my resume is going out on the street pretty quickly.
On the other hand, if I take an idea to my boss and he says "I'm not sure that we can do it that way. Can you suggest another way to accomplish that?", well, I'm encouraged and am going to try that much harder.
If the company loses a deal and the CEO says "We know what went wrong in this case, and we'll use that to do better on the next one!", my confidence level is raised, rather than diminished.
And how do you get to be that way?
No
cause has he to say his doom is harsh,
Who’s made the master of his destiny.
Friedrich Von Schiller (1759–1805), German dramatist, poet, historian.
This is a tough question, and one that I wrestled with for years. What it comes down to is an internal system of belief. I'm not talking about religious belief, really. I'm talking about belief in oneself - in my own ability or skill or attitude or inner strength - to accept what comes, to deal with it in a positive way, and to come out the other side with a new strength and confidence.
Most of us have heard of the "Serenity Prayer" (here's an excellent presentation of the prayer and its history) - I'd suggest you follow the link and read it carefully, if you never have or haven't recently. It's a remarkable bit of reassurance and reaffirmation, which is undoubtedly the reason it has become so well known and an integral part of the Alcoholics Anonymous program. I certainly can't say it any better.
But I can think about each of the key pieces:
Grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change...
This is right at the heart of things. While I'm not saying one should give up without trying, there are moments when I must accept that whatever is happening is outside of my control. If I can't control these events, I can determine how I'll feel about them. "Serene" is a good choice! Notice that it doesn't say "defeated" or "discouraged" or "depressed"!
the Courage to change the things I can...
Frankly, I'd have put them in the reverse order. My first view of things is to attack a problem, assault a challenge, address a need before accepting that it's something that I can't change. Every time somethings smacks me in the face, I have the opportunity to fall down or smack back. Which do you choose? Now if the thing that smacked me is a house that just fell on me out of the sky, I might not have the ability to smack it back. But I'm going to think about it very hard before I fall back on my serenity.
and the Wisdom to know the difference.
And this is the biggie. When do I gird my loins to fight to the death, and when do I smile, nod, and move along? In each instance, I have the choice, based on what is important to me. My priorities. Yup. Not yours, not my boss's, not my spouse's or my children's - mine!
Lest anyone mistake me, I believe that I am, indeed, the master of my destiny and the captain of my fate.
And so are you - of your destiny and fate, of course!
Wishing you health, wealth, and happiness,
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Steven works with entrepreneurs, executives, and professionals who want to clarify their communications and concepts so that they can dramatically increase their business profitability.
Steven
List is the co-founder of BackOfTheRoom.com, an online bookstore specializing in self-published and small press products.
Steven has delivered speeches to international, national and local
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Steven has benefited from a heart attack, business failure, and job layoffs, leading to his owning and running a successful business, leading numerous teams in business and volunteer work, and to being married for over 25 years and having four children. His philosophy, “The Money is in Your Blind Spot!™” addresses finding value in the skills, knowledge, expertise, experience, and people we take for granted. Steven mixes wit, enthusiasm and humor with motivational stories to deliver hard-hitting messages that compel attendees to achieve astounding results in their life, work and relationships. Known for his passion and sincerity, Steven is an accomplished and exciting speaker who speaks from real life experiences – not textbook theory. People who hear Steven speak learn real lessons that they can use tomorrow.
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