T is for Try

I struggled with the topic for this month. There were several good "T" words, not least of which is "think." But "try" is so essential to my philosophy...

"Okay, I'll try."

What are your thoughts when you hear that?

Are you convinced that the speaker will accomplish the goal? Do you get an overwhelming sense of commitment and dedication?

Let's assume that we're talking about a surgeon, about to perform an operation on you or someone you love. Do you want to hear them say "I'll try?"

"Perhaps," you say, "they don't yet know how to do it."

True - if you don't know how, it makes sense to say "I'll try."

Then again, would you rather hear "I'll try" or "Let's do it!"?

If it's you that's saying it, what do you mean?

I know that when I say "I'll try," it means that I'm leaving room for failure to achieve. After all, if I were committed and confident, I'd say "I'll do it!"

Isn't that nicely subtle? How wonderful that by changing the words I use, I change from uncommitted to committed; from tentative to assured; from maybe to definitely.

Consider the impact of the quote from John Kennedy... would it have been as memorable or powerful if he'd said

"...ask not what your country can try to do for you; ask what you can try to do for your country."

I don't think so.

Blind Spot #4: The Back Door

Everything above is really about Blind Spot #4 - self-deception through subtle shades of meaning.

We human beings have a natural tendency to leave ourselves an out, a back door. Try versus do is a classic example. We say words that sound like we're committing, and yet we're not. And if we fail to achieve or deliver, we can always say "I only said I'd try, not that I was promising that I'd do it."

Why? Why leave the back door? Why avoid solid commitment?

Several possibilities leap to mind, the foremost of which is...

Fear of Failure

And yet, isn't failure what it's all about?

What are you talking about, Steven? None of us sets out to fail!

Of course not - certainly not me, and most likely not you. So why on Earth would I say "failure is what it's all about?"

Realistically, we learn the most from failure. Success teaches us some, but failure teaches us far more.

So am I countering what I said above? No!

I believe quite firmly that if you don't set out to do something, you don't achieve and you don't learn. That's why I like the quote from Lloyd Jones - but I would rephrase it:

The people who set out to do something and fail are infinitely better off than those who try to do nothing and succeed.

Wishing you health, wealth, and happiness,

send feedback about this newsletter

view newsletter archives

As always, the options to unsubscribe from this newsletter or to change your email address or other settings are at the bottom of this mailing. While I hope you won't choose to unsubscribe, I respect your right to do so and will always make it as easy as possible

Steven works with entrepreneurs, executives, and professionals who want to clarify their communications and concepts so that they can dramatically increase their business profitability.

Material in this newsletter is copyright © 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005 Steven Marc List unless
otherwise noted, and may not be used without express written permission
This newsletter may be forwarded and shared at will.